Ventricular tachycardia. First with a pulse, then after cardioversion, it went pulseless. Great...I figured I was going to go 0 for 5 and prepared for my inevitable asystole (CPR, push epi, CPR, push epi, H's & T's, CPR, push epi, call it and offer condolences).
It didn't happen. Did. Not. Happen.
For the first time in 5 ACLS classes, my patient lived...well, lived long enough for me to transfer him out to the CICU. But the patient was alive when I was done with him!
Showing posts with label nursing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label nursing. Show all posts
June 1, 2017
September 17, 2016
Right, crush my spirit
It's rather disheartening to learn that the IV saline lock that I placed--which I thought was pretty darn good--was deemed inadequate. I hit it on the first stick, it flushed well, no problems noted...but to those that know more about IV therapy than I, it wasn't a good job. Bah.
Yeah, I know: practice, practice, practice. But given how I float around a lot, I don't always get the patients who need IVs started. And it's kind of hard to practice on myself.
I think it's time to take an official IV therapy and phlebotomy course.
Yeah, I know: practice, practice, practice. But given how I float around a lot, I don't always get the patients who need IVs started. And it's kind of hard to practice on myself.
I think it's time to take an official IV therapy and phlebotomy course.
February 24, 2016
Grieving
I will admit that when my father died, I was the only one who didn't break into torrents of hysterical tears. I still haven't, though there have been times I've gone misty-eyed and sad. I was the stoic one who kept an even keel while the arrangements were made, while we got through the holidays, while we helped our mother tie up things with dad's estate. His remains were sent to me to hold onto to while my mom decided what to finally do with them. So I've been the literal (figurative? I always get them confused) rock in all of this...though I've pretty much written off ever enjoying my birthday ever again, at least for the foreseeable future, because now there's too much sadness linked to it.
I find that my grief has been manifesting in other ways.
I withdrew from life quite a bit. Haven't been talking to anyone I didn't need to. Slept a lot. Lost motivation to do lots of things I used to enjoy. Gained back 10 of the pounds that I lost (though I'm still down about 15 lbs from my starting point so that wasn't too horrible) because I wasn't exercising anymore. Felt lost, alone, abandoned. Didn't write here or anywhere for that matter. Was sketchy in my moderating appearances at the nursing forum. Threw myself into work because it was the one thing I HAD to do. In fact, work was a welcome distraction because for most of the shift, I could focus on what I had to do.
At least I didn't drink myself into oblivion or use other forms of self-medication. My bottle of alprazolam still has a layer of dust on it, its last use being on the flight back here.
The funny thing is, I didn't realize that I was grieving until someone at work asked me how things were going since the death. She had recently lost a parent too, though her loss was completely unexpected, whereas we knew my dad was going to die on a specific date or the next day. When answering her, I thought about how I was handling things...and realized all of the previous paragraph. And when another coworker talked about some of the things he was going through after the loss of his parent, I realized what he was saying sounded a lot like what I was feeling.
*sigh*
I'd love to be able to say that in realizing what I was feeling, that I was miraculously able to overcome it in the course of a couple of days and be back to my normal, chipper self. And we all know that life isn't THAT easy.
So I continue to chug along, though now I'm making an effort to get motivated to do things. It hasn't been easy, and I'm taking it a small step at time.
I find that my grief has been manifesting in other ways.
I withdrew from life quite a bit. Haven't been talking to anyone I didn't need to. Slept a lot. Lost motivation to do lots of things I used to enjoy. Gained back 10 of the pounds that I lost (though I'm still down about 15 lbs from my starting point so that wasn't too horrible) because I wasn't exercising anymore. Felt lost, alone, abandoned. Didn't write here or anywhere for that matter. Was sketchy in my moderating appearances at the nursing forum. Threw myself into work because it was the one thing I HAD to do. In fact, work was a welcome distraction because for most of the shift, I could focus on what I had to do.
At least I didn't drink myself into oblivion or use other forms of self-medication. My bottle of alprazolam still has a layer of dust on it, its last use being on the flight back here.
The funny thing is, I didn't realize that I was grieving until someone at work asked me how things were going since the death. She had recently lost a parent too, though her loss was completely unexpected, whereas we knew my dad was going to die on a specific date or the next day. When answering her, I thought about how I was handling things...and realized all of the previous paragraph. And when another coworker talked about some of the things he was going through after the loss of his parent, I realized what he was saying sounded a lot like what I was feeling.
*sigh*
I'd love to be able to say that in realizing what I was feeling, that I was miraculously able to overcome it in the course of a couple of days and be back to my normal, chipper self. And we all know that life isn't THAT easy.
So I continue to chug along, though now I'm making an effort to get motivated to do things. It hasn't been easy, and I'm taking it a small step at time.
November 23, 2015
September 22, 2015
The saga begins...
I applied for a permanent position. It was not at any of my current facilities, but an entirely different facility. And I didn't apply for a psych position, but instead for a new specialty training program. The training would be in med-surg and tele. It's 3 12s, which would let me keep my position at Job #1 a per-diem basis. It's also nights, which is perfect.
So I brushed up the resume, wrote a great cover letter, and applied online.
I don't know what my chances are...apparently the position has been up for a while, so who knows if there are multiple positions, if it/they have been filled already, or if it's just a resume collector. It's also a union facility, so internal hires get first dibs. Still, I did get into a hardcore union facility before...it'll just be tougher this time as I don't have anyone on the inside to vouch for me.
We'll see what happens.
Meanwhile, I signed up for a Spanish for Healthcare Providers class. Lately I've been assigned to a Spanish-speaking patient. Surprisingly, I manage all right: I can't really speak Spanish, and I don't understand every word the patient says, but I catch enough of them to have an idea of what's going on...some of the time.
So I brushed up the resume, wrote a great cover letter, and applied online.
I don't know what my chances are...apparently the position has been up for a while, so who knows if there are multiple positions, if it/they have been filled already, or if it's just a resume collector. It's also a union facility, so internal hires get first dibs. Still, I did get into a hardcore union facility before...it'll just be tougher this time as I don't have anyone on the inside to vouch for me.
We'll see what happens.
Meanwhile, I signed up for a Spanish for Healthcare Providers class. Lately I've been assigned to a Spanish-speaking patient. Surprisingly, I manage all right: I can't really speak Spanish, and I don't understand every word the patient says, but I catch enough of them to have an idea of what's going on...some of the time.
July 6, 2013
Swimsuit model...and happy anniversary
Four years ago today I found out that I passed the NCLEX. Happy nursing anniversary!
As I wrote earlier, we're going on a small vacation this month. I dug out an old swimsuit which fit me...for the most part. It's passable...but not flattering.
You see, even though I am now at my pre-pregnancy weight, this body does not look like it did before I actually got pregnant. Two children have wreaked their havoc on the body. The stomach is flabby from being stretched out, cut open and sewn back together. 50 pounds gained the first time and 41 pounds gained the second time...surprisingly, I do not have any stretch marks. My chest is still pornstar-esque in its dimensions, though it has shrunk slightly--I think I may now be an E cup instead of an F.
The burn scar is pretty hideous...ok, that's not the children's fault in any way, shape or form. But the fact is that I can usually pretend it doesn't exist as shorts/pants neatly conceal it. Swimsuits do not conceal it.
*sigh*
So after work, I dragged the family two towns over to where a Lane Bryant that sells swimsuits exists. One day I will graduate from having to shop there...I'm not too far off: I fit into their smallest sizes.
Anyhow, I go and look at swimsuits. Unfortunately for me, they just had a swimsuit sale and pickings are slim. If I were a size 22 or 24, no problem. A size 14 to 16, however… I did find one that could have worked. However, it had a corset-style lacing that made it impossible to get myself into…but that wasn't the deal killer. The deal killer was the $120 price tag. Seriously, if I'm going to spend over a C note on a swimsuit, it better be easy to get into and apply my sunscreen for me. Plus the fact that I intend not to be this size for the rest of my life, so why am I going to spend $120 on a swimsuit that hopefully I won't fit into a couple of months down the road.
So I went home and ordered a swimdress from their website. $50, which is more than I'd like to spend on a swimsuit…but better than $120. I just hope it arrives in time.
As I wrote earlier, we're going on a small vacation this month. I dug out an old swimsuit which fit me...for the most part. It's passable...but not flattering.
You see, even though I am now at my pre-pregnancy weight, this body does not look like it did before I actually got pregnant. Two children have wreaked their havoc on the body. The stomach is flabby from being stretched out, cut open and sewn back together. 50 pounds gained the first time and 41 pounds gained the second time...surprisingly, I do not have any stretch marks. My chest is still pornstar-esque in its dimensions, though it has shrunk slightly--I think I may now be an E cup instead of an F.
The burn scar is pretty hideous...ok, that's not the children's fault in any way, shape or form. But the fact is that I can usually pretend it doesn't exist as shorts/pants neatly conceal it. Swimsuits do not conceal it.
*sigh*
So after work, I dragged the family two towns over to where a Lane Bryant that sells swimsuits exists. One day I will graduate from having to shop there...I'm not too far off: I fit into their smallest sizes.
Anyhow, I go and look at swimsuits. Unfortunately for me, they just had a swimsuit sale and pickings are slim. If I were a size 22 or 24, no problem. A size 14 to 16, however… I did find one that could have worked. However, it had a corset-style lacing that made it impossible to get myself into…but that wasn't the deal killer. The deal killer was the $120 price tag. Seriously, if I'm going to spend over a C note on a swimsuit, it better be easy to get into and apply my sunscreen for me. Plus the fact that I intend not to be this size for the rest of my life, so why am I going to spend $120 on a swimsuit that hopefully I won't fit into a couple of months down the road.
So I went home and ordered a swimdress from their website. $50, which is more than I'd like to spend on a swimsuit…but better than $120. I just hope it arrives in time.
June 10, 2013
Walgreens...hiring nurses?
You read that right. Walgreens. The drugstore Walgreens. Not just a place to buy mascara, booze and Advil--now it's also a career options for RNs.
Apparently they are looking for people for "Nurse I" positions. I learned about it from my daily Indeed.com job bulletin. I was curious to see what Walgreens would want with a nurse, so I clicked on the link.
One year of nursing experience required (sorry, new grads). As always, BSN preferred. No mention of what compensation would be, though I imagine it's a pittance compared to the local hospitals.
The job description is your standard nursing job description, so there's no real indication of what said Nurse I might be doing. However, three big clues lead me to believe it's home health: home health or infusion experienced preferred, you must have your own transportation for visiting patients, and you must be willing to travel up to 100% of the time.
I didn't know Walgreens dabbled in home health. Interesting.
Not my cup of tea, but it may be someone else's...so if you're interested, go to indeed.com and look it up.
In other news, I start back at my main job this week. Still bittersweet about it.
I also need to call the agency and give them my availability. I figure that I'll get through my first week back first, then I'll start the agency work again.
Apparently they are looking for people for "Nurse I" positions. I learned about it from my daily Indeed.com job bulletin. I was curious to see what Walgreens would want with a nurse, so I clicked on the link.
One year of nursing experience required (sorry, new grads). As always, BSN preferred. No mention of what compensation would be, though I imagine it's a pittance compared to the local hospitals.
The job description is your standard nursing job description, so there's no real indication of what said Nurse I might be doing. However, three big clues lead me to believe it's home health: home health or infusion experienced preferred, you must have your own transportation for visiting patients, and you must be willing to travel up to 100% of the time.
I didn't know Walgreens dabbled in home health. Interesting.
Not my cup of tea, but it may be someone else's...so if you're interested, go to indeed.com and look it up.
In other news, I start back at my main job this week. Still bittersweet about it.
I also need to call the agency and give them my availability. I figure that I'll get through my first week back first, then I'll start the agency work again.
May 1, 2013
The nursing students are out in full force
I'm not seeing them at work, since I haven't returned to work yet. They're at my local coffee house, studying for finals.
There's the students of a few different schools there. They're also all at different points in their education: some are brand new baby nurses while others are getting ready for the NCLEX, and there's the whole spectrum in between. Some come in clinical gear; others show up in school sweatshirts. A few come in casual wear.
They're all hunched over textbooks and computers, endlessly quizzing themselves and their peers. I'm there drinking coffee, knitting and answering their questions in my mind...it's kind of a refresher course. I'm doing pretty well for a psych nurse out on leave.
I feel for these students. I remember the days of endless studying, though I never had study groups at coffee houses. I preferred to study alone; when I did join a study group, we were either at the library or one of our homes.
I also feel for the ones about to graduate, as the job market shows no signs of improving.
Now, the astute reader or nursing forum fan has probably figured out I'm in California, where new grad unemployment rates hover just under 50%. It really does suck to be a new grad out there...there's too much competition. Every day I read the forum threads and listen to the scuttlebutt at work, and I thank God that I served my new grad time on the other coast. Especially since I'm not a BSN...yet. I'd probably still be looking for work and I've been here going on nearly two years now.
My facility has started interviewing for its new grad programs, and I expect to see nervous students/internal employees milling the halls when I return next month. My facility does not move fast in this process.
So this is my last month of leave. It could be the start of my last month and a half, as I haven't decided exactly when I will start working in June. I may do it June 1 or stick with my original plan of June 15. We shall see.
I'll admit, it's going to be a little harder to leave little one #2 than I thought. He's so damn cute and entertaining right now. But leave I must, especially to stay competitive in this job market...thank God I can do part-time for right now.
There's the students of a few different schools there. They're also all at different points in their education: some are brand new baby nurses while others are getting ready for the NCLEX, and there's the whole spectrum in between. Some come in clinical gear; others show up in school sweatshirts. A few come in casual wear.
They're all hunched over textbooks and computers, endlessly quizzing themselves and their peers. I'm there drinking coffee, knitting and answering their questions in my mind...it's kind of a refresher course. I'm doing pretty well for a psych nurse out on leave.
I feel for these students. I remember the days of endless studying, though I never had study groups at coffee houses. I preferred to study alone; when I did join a study group, we were either at the library or one of our homes.
I also feel for the ones about to graduate, as the job market shows no signs of improving.
Now, the astute reader or nursing forum fan has probably figured out I'm in California, where new grad unemployment rates hover just under 50%. It really does suck to be a new grad out there...there's too much competition. Every day I read the forum threads and listen to the scuttlebutt at work, and I thank God that I served my new grad time on the other coast. Especially since I'm not a BSN...yet. I'd probably still be looking for work and I've been here going on nearly two years now.
My facility has started interviewing for its new grad programs, and I expect to see nervous students/internal employees milling the halls when I return next month. My facility does not move fast in this process.
So this is my last month of leave. It could be the start of my last month and a half, as I haven't decided exactly when I will start working in June. I may do it June 1 or stick with my original plan of June 15. We shall see.
I'll admit, it's going to be a little harder to leave little one #2 than I thought. He's so damn cute and entertaining right now. But leave I must, especially to stay competitive in this job market...thank God I can do part-time for right now.
February 14, 2013
In the course of my OB care, I've been running into a lot of nursing students as of late. It seems like every nursing school in town is sending their students to my OB for clinicals. So I chat with said students...I tell some that I'm a nurse, while with others I say nothing about my profession. Though it usually becomes obvious in my interactions with them that I must know a little something about healthcare. I don't really mind students caring for me as I was once one myself, though if one is about to give me medication they better be able to pass my questioning without flaw. Especially since I have medication allergies.
With the exception of the hyperactive puppy and the less-than-professional midwife-in-training, both of which I encountered in December, the student experiences have been pretty positive. In fact, the last student I had--nurse midwife student--was probably one of the best I ever encountered. I never would have guessed she was a student had she not told me.
Anyhow, it's obvious what specialty the nurse midwife students want to go into.
For the other students...I can tell which ones are really interested in their OB clinical rotation--or at least open to the experience--and which ones are just there because they have to be. But I ask all what they're interested in doing when they graduate nursing school. To date, the response of all I asked has been the same: ER/trauma. Everyone wants to do ER/trauma. Of course, I'll probe a bit and see if there's other areas they are interested in, such as med-surg, L&D, OB, etc. (I never push psych unless I feel the psych vibe coming from them).
Again, it's all the same. ER/trauma or bust--nothing else exists, nothing else is a possibility. I say that's great and wish them well on the job hunt. Inside, I feel a touch of pity. With the way this job market is, few if any of them are going to end up right in the ER after graduation. Definitely not the ADN students I've encountered, not when every facility in town prefers BSNs. And those BSNs have a lot of competition for those few spots.
Better for these students and their fledgling careers if they are willing to be open to various opportunities early on and transferring to critical care later, instead of immediately taking the "ER/trauma or bust!" mentality after graduation and setting themselves up for a world of disappointment. By all means, they should pursue ER/trauma...but they also need to be realistic and remember they will be job hunting in a state where nearly 50% of new graduate nurses can't find any nursing job, let alone one in their dream specialty.
Oh well. They will figure it out on their own soon enough.
In other news, at this point in my first pregnancy, my water broke. So I go through today with somewhat baited breath and avoiding the television, lest the same movie I was watching during this point in my first pregnancy ("A View From The Top") be on. It has been playing a lot on Encore as of late. Given the plumbing issues we have to fix over the next week, it would be better if little one-to-be stayed on the inside for a bit longer.
With the exception of the hyperactive puppy and the less-than-professional midwife-in-training, both of which I encountered in December, the student experiences have been pretty positive. In fact, the last student I had--nurse midwife student--was probably one of the best I ever encountered. I never would have guessed she was a student had she not told me.
Anyhow, it's obvious what specialty the nurse midwife students want to go into.
For the other students...I can tell which ones are really interested in their OB clinical rotation--or at least open to the experience--and which ones are just there because they have to be. But I ask all what they're interested in doing when they graduate nursing school. To date, the response of all I asked has been the same: ER/trauma. Everyone wants to do ER/trauma. Of course, I'll probe a bit and see if there's other areas they are interested in, such as med-surg, L&D, OB, etc. (I never push psych unless I feel the psych vibe coming from them).
Again, it's all the same. ER/trauma or bust--nothing else exists, nothing else is a possibility. I say that's great and wish them well on the job hunt. Inside, I feel a touch of pity. With the way this job market is, few if any of them are going to end up right in the ER after graduation. Definitely not the ADN students I've encountered, not when every facility in town prefers BSNs. And those BSNs have a lot of competition for those few spots.
Better for these students and their fledgling careers if they are willing to be open to various opportunities early on and transferring to critical care later, instead of immediately taking the "ER/trauma or bust!" mentality after graduation and setting themselves up for a world of disappointment. By all means, they should pursue ER/trauma...but they also need to be realistic and remember they will be job hunting in a state where nearly 50% of new graduate nurses can't find any nursing job, let alone one in their dream specialty.
Oh well. They will figure it out on their own soon enough.
In other news, at this point in my first pregnancy, my water broke. So I go through today with somewhat baited breath and avoiding the television, lest the same movie I was watching during this point in my first pregnancy ("A View From The Top") be on. It has been playing a lot on Encore as of late. Given the plumbing issues we have to fix over the next week, it would be better if little one-to-be stayed on the inside for a bit longer.
December 7, 2012
I dropped off the jug this morning--I drove it in nestled in a bag of ice, strapped into the front seat. First I had to drop the little one off at school, so I'm sure more than a few people who walked by the truck were wondering what I was doing with a biohazard container on ice buckled into the passenger side.
I will never take peeing for granted again.
Off today as I wrap up some history homework. I'm kind of glad I'm off today. The hospital's new grad residency program has started notifying applicants, and quite a few of them who had worked for the hospital chain--some for years!--found themselves told, "sorry, but no..." And for some, it wasn't their first go-around on the wheel. If nothing else will convince you that working as an internal employee is no longer the guaranteed lock on a new grad job, this will.
The mood in the hallways is probably going to be somewhat dark for a while.
I will never take peeing for granted again.
Off today as I wrap up some history homework. I'm kind of glad I'm off today. The hospital's new grad residency program has started notifying applicants, and quite a few of them who had worked for the hospital chain--some for years!--found themselves told, "sorry, but no..." And for some, it wasn't their first go-around on the wheel. If nothing else will convince you that working as an internal employee is no longer the guaranteed lock on a new grad job, this will.
The mood in the hallways is probably going to be somewhat dark for a while.
December 5, 2012
Student woes
Not me as a student, but me dealing with nursing students. As a patient, no less.
I had two student nurses (one prelicensure, one nurse-midwife) at my most recent OB appointment. Pre-RN student was a train wreck: poor interpersonal skills, manner less than professional, kept calling me "hon" and was more excited that she was able to get a normal blood pressure reading on subsequent attempts than she was concerned about the high blood pressure on the first--and correctly done--attempt. She was so nervous and hyper it wore me out.
She meant well, I'm sure...but if this is what the local BSN program is turning out for nurses, God help us who live in this area. Hopefully she is not representative of the whole.
Nurse-midwife student was better and more professional for the most part, but her demeanor still screamed "student." Went through the motions of feeling how the baby was positioned, and still missed the location of heartbeat by a lot. Reviewed some history in too much detail--seriously, did she really need to hear again that resolved issues from 2003 were still resolved? Meanwhile, she glossed over other history which was more pertinent to my condition, such as my history of hypertension, psych issues and fibroids. After telling her that I spent the last six weeks with difficulty walking to due to sciatic pain, she still chided me for not exercising as much as I should have. She was WAY too focused on giving me education to hear my concerns about my blood pressure, vision issues and sudden weight gain (6 lb in 2 weeks can't all be salt). They were addressed with her remaking "well, it's the holidays, and if I stepped on the scale myself my weight would probably be up too."
In the end, I did get a preeclampsia screening out of her. She agreed that it was better that we get baseline data now. And better I get it done and told, "no preeclampsia, nothing to worry about!" than for the alternative to happen.
I didn't have the heart to tell either one I was a nurse. I think I may have freaked the Pre-RN student out and made her even more nervous if I told her that. I think the nurse-midwife may have figured it out when I used medical terminology fluently. Yes, I'm a psych nurse, but I can speak medical nurse pretty well.
Oh well.
Slow working for a while. I called out sick on Monday, off yesterday, today is pending whether they need me. Thursday is off, Friday and Monday were taken off as I have birthdays to celebrate.
I had two student nurses (one prelicensure, one nurse-midwife) at my most recent OB appointment. Pre-RN student was a train wreck: poor interpersonal skills, manner less than professional, kept calling me "hon" and was more excited that she was able to get a normal blood pressure reading on subsequent attempts than she was concerned about the high blood pressure on the first--and correctly done--attempt. She was so nervous and hyper it wore me out.
She meant well, I'm sure...but if this is what the local BSN program is turning out for nurses, God help us who live in this area. Hopefully she is not representative of the whole.
Nurse-midwife student was better and more professional for the most part, but her demeanor still screamed "student." Went through the motions of feeling how the baby was positioned, and still missed the location of heartbeat by a lot. Reviewed some history in too much detail--seriously, did she really need to hear again that resolved issues from 2003 were still resolved? Meanwhile, she glossed over other history which was more pertinent to my condition, such as my history of hypertension, psych issues and fibroids. After telling her that I spent the last six weeks with difficulty walking to due to sciatic pain, she still chided me for not exercising as much as I should have. She was WAY too focused on giving me education to hear my concerns about my blood pressure, vision issues and sudden weight gain (6 lb in 2 weeks can't all be salt). They were addressed with her remaking "well, it's the holidays, and if I stepped on the scale myself my weight would probably be up too."
I explained that a. I started the pregnancy overweight, b. I have not increased my food intake, and c. perhaps if they weighed me on the same scale they usually used instead of the one in the students' room, she may see my concern, especially if she's telling me that "there's such a big difference between the two scales." Especially since this scale had a fully-clothed me weighing more than 5 pounds less than a naked me weighed on my scale at home. And yes, my home scale is well-calibrated and pretty damn accurate.
In the end, I did get a preeclampsia screening out of her. She agreed that it was better that we get baseline data now. And better I get it done and told, "no preeclampsia, nothing to worry about!" than for the alternative to happen.
I didn't have the heart to tell either one I was a nurse. I think I may have freaked the Pre-RN student out and made her even more nervous if I told her that. I think the nurse-midwife may have figured it out when I used medical terminology fluently. Yes, I'm a psych nurse, but I can speak medical nurse pretty well.
Oh well.
Slow working for a while. I called out sick on Monday, off yesterday, today is pending whether they need me. Thursday is off, Friday and Monday were taken off as I have birthdays to celebrate.
February 5, 2012
Go Giants!
Now that you know who I'm rooting for today...I even have a blue sock that I'm knitting to work on during the game.
Since I plateaued this week, I decided to switch up my exercise routine. The treadmill is getting a rest this week: I'll be getting my cardio any other way but the treadmill. Today I did 60 minutes on what I think was an elliptical machine. Since I have a light work week (read: no shifts at all), I want to do some heavy-duty cardio as much as I can.
My name is getting around at work: I was asked to orient to provide coverage at one of the facility's satellites. This will be for an adult/child intensive outpatient program, straight psych. Of course I accepted the offer. I don't mind floating between so many programs--it keeps life interesting, I get to learn so many new things and I get chances to network. But educationally, I'm focusing on learning about eating disorders since that is my core unit.
So while this coming week is light, between orientation and picking up some shifts in eating disorders, the next two weeks will be pretty full with work. Then right after that will be my new hire review and then if all goes well, I will be off of probation.
Going to go finish up this week's homework so we can start cooking and settle in for the game.
February 2, 2012
Blah
Feeling very blah today. I had to motivate myself to get out of bed, then motivate myself to get to the Y (cardio and leg work today), then motivate myself to get cleaned up after the Y. Now I sit here trying to get motivated to work on this week's assignment, which I really should get a leg-up on since Sunday is the Super Bowl. And I'd like to be able to watch the game and work on the new sock that I just cast on.
Maybe it's been my medications--I forgot to take them this morning (I just took them now). Maybe it's the fact that I'm currently in the process of switching medications (I'm tapering down one as I start up the other). Maybe it's the headache I currently have (and I just took 800mg ibuprofen too). Maybe it's the fact that the groundhog saw his shadow and so it's 6 more weeks of winter (i.e., more 70 degree sunny weather, instead of 80 degree sunny weather).
I don't really think it's any of that. I think I just woke up in a blah mood. And as I tell my patients, sometimes blah happens. So here I am, trying to ride blah out. I suppose I don't have to work on my schoolwork today...but I'm working tomorrow and we have a lot to do on Saturday, so I really should suck it up and do it, even if I'm feeling blah.
The nurses who have been orienting me can't really understand why I want to get back to inpatient. They keep telling me, "no you don't" and go on about how much better outpatient is. I'll be honest, it is a sweet deal. I get paid handsomely for working in a less stressful situation. At the same time, these nurses are many years into their careers: 10, 15, 20+. Most of them came to outpatient after putting in the full inpatient tour, and wanted a comfortable place to spin out the rest of their career.
I can't say I blame them...but for me, I'm still a nursing youngster. I'm just starting my career out and I want to accumulate varied nursing experiences. Even stressful hectic inpatient ones. I need them to build my career and give me a good foundation for whatever path I plan to take when I go back for my postgraduate degree. I'm just not ready to kick it into low gear for now until retirement...especially since eventually we will return east, where I'll make a lot less working inpatient than I do here working outpatient. So you can imagine how much lower the outpatient salary will be out east.
So I did get my new phone, and I'm still trying to figure it out. It's not the iPhone: it's the Samsung Galaxy. It's the first time I've had a touch-screen phone...it's nothing like my old familiar BlackBerry. I'm trying to get it to sync its task list with the one in iCal, and it's been frustrating. Bah.
January 4, 2012
Yes!
After reading somewhere that I couldn't use "RN-BC" because I didn't have a BSN (yet) and should use "RN-C" instead, I wrote the ANCC to get the official ruling.
The official ruling is that I am indeed Meriwhen, RN-BC.
The dentist went well for the little lamb. We're off to the doctor for his school physical today. I also hit the library to get a book by someone who's recovered from borderline personality disorder: Get Me Out of Here. Figured I'd get the first-person perspective of the disorder.
October 27, 2011
A little rant about trying to have it all ways
My better half can be very annoying at times.
He's in the service, going on 15 years. We've been together for nearly 17 years so I know the drill of how it works: basically I can't rely on his schedule for anything. I've known this for 15 years and accepted it, hence the going on 17 years.
However, he is convinced that even after all these years, I don't understand this concept, as any time I many any remark about his work hours I get the whole speech of how they're unreliable and can be longer and there's no promises and he has no say in them, etc., etc., etc., inc. I tell him that I understand that, and he continues to lecture me on and on...the man's a pro at beating dead horses.
So I look for childcare arrangements so I don't have to rely on him and his schedule...and I get resistance there too. Then it's the speech of how our son shouldn't be in childcare so much, he's there so late, he's with someone he doesn't really know, etc., etc., etc., inc. Again, dead horses beaten to death.
To add insult to injury, over the last several years I've seen lots of active-duty parents able to drop off/ and pick up their kids from school or daycare, as well as see them make arrangements to cover childcare in emergencies. Mine can't seem to be able (read: willing) to do it...yet if he needs to take his car to the garage or pick up something for himself, he has no problem is being able to get out early. Right now he's on shore duty so the hours are generally better, but yet he continues to throw up his hands in protest.
What my better half doesn't get is that nursing is not 9-5...at least not the nursing job I want. I could sit in some doctor's office--if I can find one that will hire a RN over a LVN or MA--but I wouldn't be happy. Nor does the better half understand that the plum shifts are not automatically handed out to new hires...guess he's forgotten all of the evenings and weekends I had to work at my last job before I was able to move to straight days with no weekends. If I want to be hired full-time evenings or nights, no problem: I can do that instantly...but he won't like what I have to do to make it happen, nor will he step up to plate to help out.
There's a history behind my drive to work that I won't go into here...suffice it to say that I decided a long time ago that not working is not an option for my well-being. So I'm deciding that I am going to make that happen and if I need to engage childcare to do it, then so be it. I won't go out of my way to get the world's worst hours, but if that's all I can get then that's what I'm going for.
And my better half will have to make a choice: if he doesn't like the idea of childcare than he needs to make changes to be there. If he is unwilling/unable to make that effort, he'll just have to accept it.
If that sounds selfish on my part...well, as a military spouse I've made a lot of sacrifices for him over the years. I have not asked for much over the years. A little support right now would be nice though.
He's in the service, going on 15 years. We've been together for nearly 17 years so I know the drill of how it works: basically I can't rely on his schedule for anything. I've known this for 15 years and accepted it, hence the going on 17 years.
However, he is convinced that even after all these years, I don't understand this concept, as any time I many any remark about his work hours I get the whole speech of how they're unreliable and can be longer and there's no promises and he has no say in them, etc., etc., etc., inc. I tell him that I understand that, and he continues to lecture me on and on...the man's a pro at beating dead horses.
So I look for childcare arrangements so I don't have to rely on him and his schedule...and I get resistance there too. Then it's the speech of how our son shouldn't be in childcare so much, he's there so late, he's with someone he doesn't really know, etc., etc., etc., inc. Again, dead horses beaten to death.
To add insult to injury, over the last several years I've seen lots of active-duty parents able to drop off/ and pick up their kids from school or daycare, as well as see them make arrangements to cover childcare in emergencies. Mine can't seem to be able (read: willing) to do it...yet if he needs to take his car to the garage or pick up something for himself, he has no problem is being able to get out early. Right now he's on shore duty so the hours are generally better, but yet he continues to throw up his hands in protest.
What my better half doesn't get is that nursing is not 9-5...at least not the nursing job I want. I could sit in some doctor's office--if I can find one that will hire a RN over a LVN or MA--but I wouldn't be happy. Nor does the better half understand that the plum shifts are not automatically handed out to new hires...guess he's forgotten all of the evenings and weekends I had to work at my last job before I was able to move to straight days with no weekends. If I want to be hired full-time evenings or nights, no problem: I can do that instantly...but he won't like what I have to do to make it happen, nor will he step up to plate to help out.
There's a history behind my drive to work that I won't go into here...suffice it to say that I decided a long time ago that not working is not an option for my well-being. So I'm deciding that I am going to make that happen and if I need to engage childcare to do it, then so be it. I won't go out of my way to get the world's worst hours, but if that's all I can get then that's what I'm going for.
And my better half will have to make a choice: if he doesn't like the idea of childcare than he needs to make changes to be there. If he is unwilling/unable to make that effort, he'll just have to accept it.
If that sounds selfish on my part...well, as a military spouse I've made a lot of sacrifices for him over the years. I have not asked for much over the years. A little support right now would be nice though.
August 11, 2011
Miss me?
According to my blog statistics, probably not :)
Busy few months...the promotion at work is keeping me on my toes. The increased census is keeping me on my toes too. I had to finish classes at my old school, then withdraw, then apply to a new school. Summertime is also the time of certification renewal: ACLS, BLS, PALS (ok, that one will be a new one). Then there is the hassle of moving across country: finding a house, coordinating a move, coordinating school for the little one, finding a job. And let's not forget studying for the psych certification test.
Now I'm tired again...going to go to bed. More soon.
Busy few months...the promotion at work is keeping me on my toes. The increased census is keeping me on my toes too. I had to finish classes at my old school, then withdraw, then apply to a new school. Summertime is also the time of certification renewal: ACLS, BLS, PALS (ok, that one will be a new one). Then there is the hassle of moving across country: finding a house, coordinating a move, coordinating school for the little one, finding a job. And let's not forget studying for the psych certification test.
Now I'm tired again...going to go to bed. More soon.
November 16, 2010
Hmm...
Being a nurse and BSN student keeps one rather busy. These last few months had me up to my neck in classwork. What really gets me is that the fewer credits the course is, the more demands the instructor puts on us and the more work I have to do. One of my courses was only a 2 credit course, and we needed to make 9 posts a week, with the final project being a term paper and accompanying slideshow. The 3 credit course I'm in now seems like an absolute break.
I occasionally get twinges whenever I hear from classmates that went into med-surg. While I'm loving pysch and have no regrets, for that brief second I feel like a failure. Not that I am a failure in any way: med-surg is not the only area of nursing, and there's many nurses that have successful careers without even going anywhere near the area. I guess it's because that everyone pushed (pushes) it as the area that you must start off in to have any measure of nursing success. Yet I seem to be doing rather well as a nurse without it. Plus my unit gives me enough medical issues to keep it exciting.
Maybe I feel like that because of all of the rejections I got when I was hunting in med-surg. I think that's the case, because if I was truly unhappy then I'd have kept looking for the med-surg job and not carved out a full-time niche.
Or maybe it's an occasional resentful twinge, since I chose the psych job over the PCU because of the hours. I knew I couldn't be away from my child for 14-16 hour days. It's hard enough that my better half's days are at least that long, neverminding all of the underways and deployments. But you know what? I didn't want to put my child through that. We're fortunate enough in that if I didn't want to, I didn't have to work and we'd be OK financially. Not great, but we'd make it. I don't have to take a job with hellacious hours just to make ends meet. And frankly, when I look at his face, I don't want to work those hours.
And I definitely don't miss the blood, guts and demanding patients. If my patients come at me saying they need new sheets on their bed, I get to say "I'll get you clean ones so you can change them" and I won't get into trouble. Hell, I'm expected to say that :)
Oh well.
Work is going well. Still have staffing issues but since no amount of yelling and screaming will change it, I've pretty much adopted a zen attitude. I'm trying to get my supervisor to do the same. She gets so worked up over them and it's really stressing her out.
I occasionally get twinges whenever I hear from classmates that went into med-surg. While I'm loving pysch and have no regrets, for that brief second I feel like a failure. Not that I am a failure in any way: med-surg is not the only area of nursing, and there's many nurses that have successful careers without even going anywhere near the area. I guess it's because that everyone pushed (pushes) it as the area that you must start off in to have any measure of nursing success. Yet I seem to be doing rather well as a nurse without it. Plus my unit gives me enough medical issues to keep it exciting.
Maybe I feel like that because of all of the rejections I got when I was hunting in med-surg. I think that's the case, because if I was truly unhappy then I'd have kept looking for the med-surg job and not carved out a full-time niche.
Or maybe it's an occasional resentful twinge, since I chose the psych job over the PCU because of the hours. I knew I couldn't be away from my child for 14-16 hour days. It's hard enough that my better half's days are at least that long, neverminding all of the underways and deployments. But you know what? I didn't want to put my child through that. We're fortunate enough in that if I didn't want to, I didn't have to work and we'd be OK financially. Not great, but we'd make it. I don't have to take a job with hellacious hours just to make ends meet. And frankly, when I look at his face, I don't want to work those hours.
And I definitely don't miss the blood, guts and demanding patients. If my patients come at me saying they need new sheets on their bed, I get to say "I'll get you clean ones so you can change them" and I won't get into trouble. Hell, I'm expected to say that :)
Oh well.
Work is going well. Still have staffing issues but since no amount of yelling and screaming will change it, I've pretty much adopted a zen attitude. I'm trying to get my supervisor to do the same. She gets so worked up over them and it's really stressing her out.
September 6, 2009
LONG week...and the "First Year" begins.
Every night after orientation, I'd do the home bit, stay awake only as long as I had to, then pass out because I had to get up at 5:55 the next morning. Most days had working lunches, few breaks, didn't follow the schedule...and often ran behind schedule, so there were a couple of days that ran late as well. So the last thing I could bring myself to do was sit at a computer and type...sorry about that.
Lots of videos and slide presentations: customer service, OSHA, therapeutic boundaries, blood-borne pathogens, CPR, fall prevention, documentation, deescalation techniques, crisis management, safety, breaking holds and physical maneuvers...and lots of tests to accompany each educational session. I've signed my name on sign-in sheets and test papers so many times my hand hurts thinking about it. There was a lot on restraints and seclusion...and understandably so, given the nature of the business. And there was a lot about drugs, and again, understandably so. I realized on the last day how little I really know about medications used in psychiatric nursing.
Then there was also a ton of administrative stuff too: P&P, scheduling (that was a fun day as at first we thought we'd be competing against each other for shifts...not the case, thankfully), benefits (for those who got them), rules, regulations...every night, I carried home a small tree's worth of paperwork for my records.
By the last day of orientation, we were all punch-drunk from being in the same classroom for 40+ hours that it was hard to focus on anything. Thank God I am getting paid for it--I don't think I'm that desperate for work (or masochistic enough) that I'd have done that week for free. I meant to review drugs and the P&Ps this weekend, but I was so wiped from the week that I slept 11 hours each night for the last two nights.
My first day is today...in a few hours, in fact. For the next month, I'm on another orientation so I'm not expected to do everything by myself from the get-go. This month is all about learning on the job. Then after this month I'm still on orientation for another 5 months but they'll expect me to work just as any other nurse would.
It was on the last day of orientation--and again this morning--that the enormity of what I'm doing hit me, that I wasn't in Kansas...er, school anymore. I am no longer a student with a safety net. I no longer have my ignorance or instructors to fall back on. The excuse "I'm just a student" or "I didn't know, I don't work here" will no longer fly. I am going to be working as a licensed registered nurse. I'm going to have serious responsibility. I'm going to have a lot to learn and a good portion of it I will have to teach myself. I'm going to have to be very independent. I am going to have to know what the P&P are as I do "work here" now. My license in on the line from here on out, and the one and only person that is responsible for protecting it is me.
It kind of makes me want to throw my hands and say "maybe I should wait a while longer before I start."
But I know that the first year of nursing will be a learning curve--it is going to be rough no matter what area of nursing I went into...but I'm not going to get through it until I actually start it, you know? After all, all of the nurses there went through the first year--it's not as though they emerged from the womb like Athena, with DSM-IV-TR in hand and ready to hit the floor like a seasoned pro.
I guess I'm a little nervous about beginning so soon. I had no choice--I have to get a certain number of hours in during the first month so I had to put in for a lot of shifts. So wish me luck tonight, as I will need it.
In other news, I'm still trying to get the endocrinologist appointment set up. My little one starts school on Tuesday...the poor guy will be plunked there at 0600 as I have to work that day shift. I hope he'll be all right...I took him there on Thursday to show him around and meet his teacher. He seemed pretty excited about it, but I'm also not sure it's sunk into his mind yet that he's not going to his usual provider but to school.
Lots of videos and slide presentations: customer service, OSHA, therapeutic boundaries, blood-borne pathogens, CPR, fall prevention, documentation, deescalation techniques, crisis management, safety, breaking holds and physical maneuvers...and lots of tests to accompany each educational session. I've signed my name on sign-in sheets and test papers so many times my hand hurts thinking about it. There was a lot on restraints and seclusion...and understandably so, given the nature of the business. And there was a lot about drugs, and again, understandably so. I realized on the last day how little I really know about medications used in psychiatric nursing.
Then there was also a ton of administrative stuff too: P&P, scheduling (that was a fun day as at first we thought we'd be competing against each other for shifts...not the case, thankfully), benefits (for those who got them), rules, regulations...every night, I carried home a small tree's worth of paperwork for my records.
By the last day of orientation, we were all punch-drunk from being in the same classroom for 40+ hours that it was hard to focus on anything. Thank God I am getting paid for it--I don't think I'm that desperate for work (or masochistic enough) that I'd have done that week for free. I meant to review drugs and the P&Ps this weekend, but I was so wiped from the week that I slept 11 hours each night for the last two nights.
My first day is today...in a few hours, in fact. For the next month, I'm on another orientation so I'm not expected to do everything by myself from the get-go. This month is all about learning on the job. Then after this month I'm still on orientation for another 5 months but they'll expect me to work just as any other nurse would.
It was on the last day of orientation--and again this morning--that the enormity of what I'm doing hit me, that I wasn't in Kansas...er, school anymore. I am no longer a student with a safety net. I no longer have my ignorance or instructors to fall back on. The excuse "I'm just a student" or "I didn't know, I don't work here" will no longer fly. I am going to be working as a licensed registered nurse. I'm going to have serious responsibility. I'm going to have a lot to learn and a good portion of it I will have to teach myself. I'm going to have to be very independent. I am going to have to know what the P&P are as I do "work here" now. My license in on the line from here on out, and the one and only person that is responsible for protecting it is me.
It kind of makes me want to throw my hands and say "maybe I should wait a while longer before I start."
But I know that the first year of nursing will be a learning curve--it is going to be rough no matter what area of nursing I went into...but I'm not going to get through it until I actually start it, you know? After all, all of the nurses there went through the first year--it's not as though they emerged from the womb like Athena, with DSM-IV-TR in hand and ready to hit the floor like a seasoned pro.
I guess I'm a little nervous about beginning so soon. I had no choice--I have to get a certain number of hours in during the first month so I had to put in for a lot of shifts. So wish me luck tonight, as I will need it.
In other news, I'm still trying to get the endocrinologist appointment set up. My little one starts school on Tuesday...the poor guy will be plunked there at 0600 as I have to work that day shift. I hope he'll be all right...I took him there on Thursday to show him around and meet his teacher. He seemed pretty excited about it, but I'm also not sure it's sunk into his mind yet that he's not going to his usual provider but to school.
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