November 2, 2012

Relieved...ironically

Yet more RN-BSN stuff.  If you're sick of the saga, feel free to skip--I won't be offended.

I decided to drop Vulnerable Populations.  I got hold of a course syllabus and saw way too much work...well, not too much if it were a class on its own.  But with History Part 2, working and pregnancy...I can't do it.  At least not successfully and keep my sanity.  I may as well go back to working inpatient while I'm at it.  I also got hold of a Research course syllabus just to see if I'd do better in swapping the classes and taking that one instead, but again:  the extent of work involved for the class is intense.

Since if I was going to drop it'd have to be done today, I spent the whole morning (while I should have been studying for my history test) weighing the pros and cons of everything.  In the end, I decided that having my sanity for the next four months instead of being an insane, overstressed git was far more important than taking a second course right now.  And I have come to some terms with the fact that even if I were to give birth early, it may be too much for me start taking classes right in February anyway.  So the odds were good that my graduation date was going to be pushed back anyway because of the new little one's arrival.

So I logged in and dropped it.

I have to admit that I feel a sense of peace.  I do feel disappointment, yes:  in fact, I am VERY disappointed that I will have to push things back even further.  But I also feel peace.  I was worried about how I'd get through November with working full-time for at least half the month plus tackling the history class.   I've spent the last few weeks dwelling on this (in case you didn't see it in my prior posts).  The past week has been the worst as I've been debating with myself over it.  

Now I can look forward to the later part of pregnancy without having to stress about juggling two classes and an increased work schedule.  I can start knitting for the little one.  I can relax and rest while I can before said little one's arrival.  I will be able to enjoy the holidays and my birthday and not stress over multiple assignment deadlines.  And I can take the last two classes and Capstone during a period where I'll be working less than I am now, if I haven't yet gone back to work.  Taking class without working at the same time--now THAT would be a real treat.

I may even be able to appreciate this history class more.  Though I still wish the drama would get resolved.