November 1, 2012

Well, ****

Overall, an unremarkable day at work.  A very unusual admission that I wouldn't be surprised had an Axis II in there somewhere.  A few patients showed up in costume.  Some nurses wore holiday-themed outfits but no costumes per se.   Me?  I wore all basically, I wore what I usually wear.  I was glad not to be working inpatient that evening though...full moon plus Halloween isn't promising for a psych environment.

History Part 2 is turning out to be like History Part 1, except with far more reading.  There's already several threads in the class's Help forum complaining about the workload.  The syllabus states that the course should take 12-18 hours a week.  The reality is that it takes at least twice that.   Not a single one of us (and I've heard from many) can do all of the assigned in their suggested guidelines.  Even if I cut corners wherever I can (for example, I only read the textbooks and not every single primary reading), I'm still clocking 24+ hours myself. Plus all of us are working at least part-time, and many of us are taking at least one other class.  So there are a lot of grumpy campers in the lot.

Surprisingly, only one instructor chimed in, and it was a sympathy post.  The rest are silent.

I've refrained from complaining since I'm nearly at the end of the RN-BSN program and I just want it over with.  Also, I have limited options as to taking it elsewhere.  I'm also not very grumpy or frustrated about the class...I guess because I've been through History Part 1 so I know in general what to expect.  I have an idea of what they are looking for us to do in the assignments.  I'm also spurred on by the fact that it will be over in 6 more weeks, and that will finish off all of the non-nursing classes.  And I've already given up on the A, and I haven't even taken the first test yet.  

But with all of this activity in the History department, I did think about moving Vulnerable Populations to the spring session.  There's a 5 week session right before the baby is born (literally, it ends on 2/17) and I figured I'd slide it in there and take the chance that the little one arrives right on his due date.  Well, that particular class isn't offered on that date, so I'm stuck taking it with History.   Oh well, I guess it'll be all right.  I survived History Part 1 along with Older Adults and Management.

To make matters worse, the next session for Research (and Vulnerable Populations if I wanted to postpone it) starts on 2/25.  I'm due on 2/24.  So my planned Research class will be started possibly while I'm in postpartum recovery...that's assuming the little one arrives on schedule as planned. 

And just to ice the cake, the Research and Vulnerable Populations classes are offered again until the summer session.  So if I miss the 2/25 session, I'm stuck waiting.  And waiting. 

Well, fuck indeed.  

It's so damn frustrating to be this close to my BSN and have to face the possibility of postponing it even more.  I'm still stinging over the fact that had I paid attention to my class schedule last spring, I wouldn't have missed the deadline for the government class, I could have stuck to my course map, and I would have been taking my Capstone class in January.  At least Capstone is offered nearly every five-week session.

I have to put this all in perspective though.  Short of a scheduled C-section (not likely at this time) or planned induction (more likely:  my last pregnancy would have seen me induced at 39 weeks had I actually made it to that day), there's little I can to regarding when the new little one is born.   Except Let Go and Let God:  I'm praying for another early labor.  But whenever little one arrives is when he arrives, and if it turns out that he arrives on time or *gulp* late, that's when he arrives and like it or now, I'd have to skip the class.

The other reality is that as I'm recovering from childbirth, I may not be ready to take on a class for those first few weeks.  I'll probably be exhausted and crawling out from the baby blues.  I may say that I'm all for starting my Research class one week after childbirth.  After all, a week after my first little one was born, I had family in and was already working on holiday shopping (albeit as a tired and emotional wreck.  I did it though).  This time around, I'm several years older.  Overall I'm handing this pregnancy better, but what about the actual childbirth itself?


Maybe I should just intentionally postpone things and focus on low stress now and post-partum recovery later...but I can't bring myself to do that.  Not after nearly four years of trying to get this degree done, so I can move on to the next step in my career.

*sigh* indeed.

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