August 12, 2009

Sometimes it's really hard...

Not to feel bitter about how the job hunt is going.   Not to feel bitter towards the facilities for treating new graduates like we have rabies.   Not to feel bitter towards the hospitals for bragging about how much they are recruiting but who also plaster "No New Grads" in bold print on every job announcement that they post. Not to feel bitter towards recruiters who at the best seem like they'd rather not be bothered with new grads, and at the worst are outright hostile towards us.

 Not to feel bitter at LPNs and CNAs who, based on all of the job postings I see for them, apparently only have to close their eyes and throw a rock, and they're guaranteed to hit on a job offer.  Not to feel bitter towards classmates that managed to land jobs.  Not to feel bitter towards anyone who has managed to land jobs.

Not to feel bitter towards those who have nursing jobs but whine about how busy they are and/or how much they hate their job.  Not to feel bitter towards those who are posting that they can't decide between two or three jobs when many of us don't even have one.  Not to feel bitter towards those who tell you "oh, this will all get better" because you damn well know they already have a job as they say it. 

I can go on but I think you get the idea.

Sorry, I had to get that out.   For the most part, I'm not bitter.   And you can spare me the lectures because I fully understand that the market sucks right now.  I know that LPNs and CNAs don't really have it easier.  I know that facilities are cutting their staff down to the bone.  I know that recruiters have to deal with hundreds of people like me every day.  I don't feel a sense of entitlement towards anything--all I'm asking for is a chance to prove myself.  And I'm pleased for anyone whose found a job during these times--doubly so if I know them personally--because that helps encourage me to keep on trying.

But I'm also human and can't help but feel frustrated at times. 

Cathartic exercise done.  Moving on.

I went to talk to the hospital that I want to work for to remind them of my existence.  I chatted with one of their nurse recruiters and left her my updated information.   I wasn't expecting any more than that, really.  She was nice and didn't treat me like new grad slime, thus restoring some of my faith in nurse recruiters. 

The SNF hasn't called yet, but my friend did--and yes, I was being paranoid:  she was busy...she also had tried to text me on her first day but forgot to hit Send Message.  Anyhow, apparently SNF is very busy preparing for inspections or meetings or somethings, and she thinks that's why they did not call me.  That made me glad I didn't call them today, but I decided to call them tomorrow morning to see what's up.  I'm having a feeling that it's going to be a "No".  I know, that's not very optimistic...I guess my mood is still a little bleak.

At least I found out that tomorrow will be a day of rejoicing regardless of what happens with the phone call:  the new dishwasher will be here.  I can't wait to break it in...but at the same time, I can't bring myself to leave a sink full of dirty dishes overnight to use in it tomorrow.  I can't stand a sink full of dishes...I really can't stand it.  It ranks right up there with the sound made when you rub a balloon.  I immediately shove them in the dishwasher or wash them by hand.  When I go to my friends' homes, I will start clearing their sink--unasked--if I see it's full.  None of them are offended by it...in fact, I think a few plan their kitchen activities around my visits.

Speaking of which, I decided to spend the evening surrounded by friends, eating good food, drinking fine wine and getting moral support.  Again, another reason why I don't lose weight.  And yes, I did wash the dishes.